How do you make decisions based on your enneagram type? Have you ever thought about what goes into making a decision? It happens automatically. We make thousands of decisions everyday, without giving much thought to the process. Did you know that even how you make decisions is based on your enneagram type? Let’s dive in to the realm of decision making, and why we decide the way we do. Firstly, it’s important to know what the word “decide” really means. The word, decide, basically means, “to kill off.” Does this surprise you? Let’s go deeper. The first part of the word (or the prefix) “de,” simply means “off.” But the other part of the word, “cide,” is found in words like: homicide, suicide, and genocide, and means “to cut,” or “kill.” So together we come up with a succinct definition: “to kill off.” Does this definition ring true for you and your experience of deciding? Do you think about decisions as killing off all the other options, and moving forward in the direction you have chosen? Whether you think of it this way or not, this is actually what is happening when you decide something. When you say “yes” to one thing, it means you are saying “no” to something else. You are “cutting off” other opportunities in order to give your, “yes.” This is the cost of making a decision. Now how does the enneagram come into play with decision making? Our decisions are closely related with our key motivations and how we process information. Each enneagram type will subconsciously follow a pattern of decision making based on these two components. If you are looking to improve your decision making habits, this is a great place to start. By being aware of our patterns, we can then decide to change them. So how do you make decisions based on your enneagram type? Enneagram Type 1 When it comes to decision making for ones, they want to make the right choice. This is the key motivation behind almost every decision that a type one makes. They are usually pretty quick decision makers, and know instinctively what the right choice is, based on their own set of personal standards and systems they have set up for themselves. However, they can get into trouble with how they process information. Ones are primarily anchored to the present, and also have a repressed thinking intelligence center. This means that ones can get stuck in their head, over-thinking, or over-criticizing themselves and the decision. Enneagram Type 2 Twos are greatly motivated by how received they are by others. This impacts their decision making because they want to please the people around them, as well as receive their love and approval. They make most decisions based on the perceived needs of others, and rarely consider their own wants or desires. This self-neglect gets them into trouble. They might even end up resenting others for not reciprocating care. Enneagram Type 3 Threes are motivated by success, or even the appearance of success. This influences their decision making by what they allow, and do t allow. They are also extremely driven, and value efficiency, which adds another element into decisions. If the decision reflects well on them, helps them achieve their goals, and can be done effectively – it is a definite yes for threes. They get into trouble when decisions become more about pretense, than authenticity. Deception can look grey to threes, as long as they are getting the results they want, they may be unaware at what cost. Enneagram Type 4 Fours are motivated by deep longings to be significant. This colors their decisions through self-expression, as well as how they show up in the world. Fours would never want to appear fake or phony. Their decisions center around their truth and their own identities. However, fours get stuck in the decision making process of actually moving forward. Since fours are anchored to the past (being in the withdrawn stance) they have trouble moving into action. Fours are “doing repressed.” They are great about dreaming up fanciful ideas, and beautiful plans, but sometimes the follow through just isn’t there. Enneagram Type 5 Fives are motivated by a desire to be capable, as well as to gain knowledge. Their decision making process involves extensive research, as well as logically processing, and thinking through how well they can prepare. Fives are usually steady decision makers who don’t take risks. They are measured, and weigh out possible outcomes. Similarly to type fours, fives are in the withdrawn stance and sometimes struggle with taking a plan into action. They love the research part of decision making, and may spend all their time dedicated to learning more and more about the current topic. Fives are not quick decision makers, and need time to process feelings and facts around the decision. Enneagram Type 6 Sixes are motivated by security and safety. They are also concerned with what is best for the whole group. These motivations are at the core of how sixes make decisions. Will it be safe? Will everyone benefit from the decision? Sixes want to make sure their decisions will be supported, as well as connecting in a relational way. However, sixes get stuck in over-thinking and anxiety when it comes to making a decision. They doubt themselves, and their own instincts toward making the right decision. They will often seek guidance outside themselves before making a decision, asking a trusted friend, or looking up answers from other trusted sources. Enneagram Type 7 Sevens are motivated by satisfaction, and enjoyment. They are usually up for anything and always want to be included. When it comes to decision making, their first instinct is, “yes, let’s do it!” They might over-extend themselves, by agreeing to do everything. They are quick decision makers, and clever enough to sometimes make this work for them. However, sevens may experience burnout easily by taking on too much and doing too much. They need to carefully consider what they are saying yes to. Being in the aggressive stance, sevens are very action oriented, but also feelings repressed. It’s important to slow down, and consider the feelings around decisions. Enneagram Type 8 Eights are motivated by not being controlled, and by justice. They are quick decision makers, and know instinctively what needs done, and they do it. This type has confidence in their decision making skills and has no trouble telling others what the decision is. It is easy for them to see clearly, without a lot of time needed for discussion, or planning. However, eights sometimes bulldoze over others in their quick powerful decisions. They are also in the aggressive stance, meaning they take in the world through instincts/ the body, and support their decisions with thinking; completely skipping over feelings. Some of their decision making also occurs as a result of them not wanting to be controlled. Enneagram Type 9 Nines are motivated by inner and outer peace. They might have the hardest time with the decision making process. Nines often “merge” with those around them, agreeing to what everyone else wants in order to keep the peace. They also have a hard time prioritizing actions. All tasks and decision can look of equal importance to a type nine. Nines are in the withdrawn stance, which looks like distraction for them. Instead of doing the important task, or making that important decision, a type nine might keep busy doing other things instead of those main tasks. This shows their tendency toward being “doing repressed,” and greatly affects their decision making. A reminder app, or special “to do” planner can be helpful for nines. Wasn’t that fun? I hope you enjoyed learning about how each enneagram type handles the decision making process. We are all so different! Isn’t it fascinating? Want to know more about each enneagram type? Check out the 9 types enneagram packet. This packet includes a page for each enneagram type, covering all the basics to understand that type! grab the packet! Bring the enneagram to your group! Start seeing better connections, more compassion for each other, and clear understanding. The enneagram improves relationships of all kinds. Check out the offerings below: enneagram for beginners course All 9 Types Quiz
Harry Potter and The Enneagram Seeing the enneagram through fictional characters is a really fun way to allow ourselves to look deeply at the enneagram types. It takes the pressure off of ourselves, and opens up a new way of seeing, especially when it is characters we know well. Since our enneagram and Fictional Characters series has been one of our most popular, we decided to dig deeper into Harry Potter and the enneagram, specifically. This series will cover many of the characters from Harry Potter and the various enneagram types they could be perceived to represent. Today, let’s look at types one and two. Enneagram Type One Professor Minerva McGonagall At first glance, Professor McGonagall appears rigid; a stern giver of rules and order at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It’s true, type ones feel an enormous responsibility to how things should be run, and that there is in fact a right way to do everything. They are also motivated to improve things in every area, making type ones like McGonagall terrific candidates for the teacher role. Professor McGonagall has the unique position to spot good in others and push them to embrace and realize it. She spots greatness in Harry, not only as a potentially superb Quidditch player, but also as someone who can take on challenges far above the average student in the magical world. The core desire of type one is to attain and keep integrity. They not only want to do good, and be good, but they also want others to realize this about them. This goal falls into perfectionism for types like McGonagall. They are very self critical, and expect the highest from themselves as well as others. “I assure you that if you die, you need not hand it in.” Professor McGonagall Hermione Granger “There is a RIGHT way and a WRONG way to do everything.” Ones like Hermione Granger, can be great leaders. They are known to have a solid moral compass, and care deeply about doing what is right in all scenarios. As Hermione shows best, they are the ideal student as well. A type one wouldn’t dream of turning in an assignment late, or breaking a rule. However, if justice is at stake, a “Hermione” just might decide its worth the trade off. What does Hermione want from her friends? Ones value honesty above all. Hermione doesn’t like games, or not saying what you mean. She needs Harry and Ron to give it to her straight. Justice and integrity are a close second for what she values most. Doing what is right, earns points in her book! Speaking of books… we know Hermione is the Queen of reading! She expects her friends to meet her in this way too (though we know Hary and Ron fall short)! I mean who wouldn’t want to read “Hogwarts, A History!” Hermione expects to be treated with fairness. She seeks to be an “equal player” in everything. She accepts nothing that she doesn’t earn. Though ones like Hermione can be supremely independent, they long for the connection of true friendships, and are great at being in the present moment. The last thing Hermione needs from her friends, is the reminder to relax and have some fun! She can be too serious, and needs to loosen up. Remember: Ones share a line with type 7 (The entertaining enthusiast) This means they have access to the type that cares most about fun! Ones need to reach out for this point. It feeds them in a special way and makes them sigh with relief at putting down some of their responsibilities. Enneagram Types Two of Harry Potter Mrs. Weasley harry potter and the enneagram “How DARE you steal that car!” Molly Weasley Molly represents type 2 well with her warm gift of hospitality and care. Twos are known as “the helpers.” From the first time we meet Molly, she is helping Harry make it through platform nine and three quarters for the very first time. She serves her family and nurtures them with love and generosity. Molly makes the Burrow feel like the kind of place any kid would want to grow up in. It’s quirky and comfy, yet meals are had together, and everyone has what they need most. Everyone who visits is received with a hug and brought lovingly into her space. She also displays 2 characteristics as she interacts with the members of The Order of the Phoenix. She is still the tower of comfort and support, the warmth in the dark and confusing moments. Type 2 is also known for their compassion, adaptability, and empathy. Molly clearly reads the emotions of others and acts accordingly. Though sometimes she might help “too” much, which is common with twos. Her boldness comes from her connection to type 8. Twos and eights share a line, allowing Molly to lash at at moments of overwhelm or extreme emotion. The moment we hear her voice in the howler Ron receives about stealing the car, is a great example. Hagrid Our friendly, lovable Hagrid is also an enneagram type two. He displays the type twos core desire of wanting to be loved for who they are. Hagrid is often misplaced and misunderstood. He finds his own way to nurture through taking care of animals and the famous three. At his best, Hagrid is kind, caring, and sacrifices for others. He took the blame for a crime he didn’t commit, and was never truly rectified after this event. As an unjustified outcast, he just wants to show love and care to others. He often doesn’t think of the consequences of his choices to take on more and more creatures to care for. Many of them end up being extremely dangerous, but he inly sees the good, and the care that he will give them as well as the love he gets in return from these animals. Hagrid is always willing to help. You’ve got slugs shooting out your mouth? Hagrid is there for you. You need someone to talk to about a friend problem? Hagrid will listen. Need an escort through the forbidden forest? He is at your side. What do Hagrid and Molly need from others? APPRECIATION!!! Type twos need to hear that what they have done for you mattered. They pour into the people around them, and they need to know that you recognize their effort and hard work. Twos also want you to listen to them once in a while. They are used to being on the receiving end of everyone else’s problems, but they have problems too! Be a good listener! Also, they hate criticism. Give it to them softly and surrounded by compliments! Thanks for reading the beginning post of Harry Potter and the Enneagram! I hope you enjoyed this! More types are on their way! Live Inspired! You might also like: Enneagram Type One and Fictional Characters Enneagram Type Two and Fictional Characters Learn more about all 9 types with the 9 types overview packet! It includes one page for each number on everything you need to know! Grab the packet now! Are you looking for more enneagram printables? We have pages on motivation, strengths, weaknesses, how to be your best self… and more! Check out more awesome digital downloads here: yes! Show me the enneagram sheets!
The Enneagram and Spiritual Practices Type Two Hey there, friends and lovers of the enneagram! Last week, we introduced the idea of using the enneagram and spiritual practices together. Both are great tools to add to our over all wellness, but using the enneagram to specifically choose a spiritual practice is completely fascinating to me. This gives us the most opportunity for growth in our awareness, in our own number, and in our lives. Today, we are going to be focusing on enneagram type two. To check out last week’s introductory post as well as spiritual practices for type one, click the button below: The Enneagram and Spiritual Practices Intro (plus type one) Let’s review… What is a Spiritual Practice? A spiritual practice is something you do regularly and intentionally to experience the Divine and grow in awareness and expansiveness. There are multiple ways to do this, maybe even endless ideas of practices. Spiritual practices help connect us to the path we want to be on, and help us become who we want to be. Furthermore, a practice keeps us connected to our goals even when our heart is not in it. The structure of the practice allows for the ups and downs of life, while being that stable thing we can come back to. It works like a muscle, or a habit. The more you do it at the same time and in the same way, it’s going to get stronger and become second nature to you. Goals and Beginnings You might be wondering, how do I start a spiritual practice if I’ve never had one before? It is important not to overwhelm yourself by trying to do too much too fast. The best way to begin, is with a small achievable goal. Set aside just 5-10 minutes to focus on your practice at the same time every day. By setting aside the time and sticking to it, you will really begin to see a change in your life. And you will look forward to this special time in your day, that you have made just for your practice. For example, if you wanted to add a meditation practice into you day, don’t start out with a goal of twenty minutes. This might be your long-term goal, but on your first day of meditation, this is too steep a mountain to climb! Begin with two minutes for a week long period. When that feels satisfying and doable, add more minutes. In a few months you may reach you goal of a twenty minute meditation practice. Enneagram Type 2 and Spiritual Practices The hardest part for enneagram type 2, might just be setting aside that time for themselves everyday. Setting boundaries and taking care of themselves is a constant struggle for twos, but one they can win with some intentional effort. Twos need to know that they deserve the time to grow in the ways they desire, and that this is not self-ish. Actually, spending time positively working on themselves in a spiritual practice is the opposite of selfish. The effects of this practice will not only improve their lives, but it will allow them to be the best they can be for the people around them. Which is what twos love best, taking care of others. Twos- remember that you are worth this time! You deserve self care, and you deserve a space of spiritual practice that is just for you! Upriver and Downriver Practices I am for all spiritual practices because they add so much depth to your day, and essentially your life. However, as we are combining our enneagram numbers with the most ideal practices, we are thinking about what practices will allow for the most growth for each number. Downriver practices- your downriver practices are going to come naturally to you. These are things you are so inclined to do that is feels like floating downriver on a sunny day. Upriver practices- These are things you are not good at. It will take a great amount of effort for you to try these practices, but these will also produce the most growth and awareness for you on your journey. These will feel like paddling upriver through some rapids! Practices for Type 2 The number one spiritual practice that I recommend for type twos, is centering prayer. What is centering prayer? Centering prayer, is a specific kind of prayer that is silent. The goal is, in the silence to experience God’s presence, and to prepare yourself to receive the gift of God knowing you completely, and loving you just as you are. It is an experience so deep and meaningful, beyond thinking, but being in the presence of God, the very breath of life. The enneagram and spiritual practices Why is this a needed spiritual practice for type two? Type twos struggle with knowing that they are loved for who they are. Deep inside them, their wounded message is that they must earn love and acceptance from others by serving and doing things for them. This is the opposite of grace and the message of the Divine. There is nothing you need to do. Twos need to know that they can show up exactly as they are, sit in silence and feel the Presence as unconditional full, and radiant love. This practice over time will greatly grow their capacity for self love, which in turn, moves into real relationship and love of others. This practice develops the relationship with the Divine, the discipline of having intentional boundaries, and encourages the idea that being present is all that is needed. This upriver practice challenges the type two’s desire to move and act. Twos are thinking repressed, meaning they function primarily through the doing and feeling centers of intelligence. Slowing down to sit in a space where nothing is expected of them, where they can empty out negativity, judgement, and poor thinking, is incredibly healing. I hope you look into trying this upriver practice if you are a type two. And if you know a type two, encourage them to give it a try. Continue with your downriver practices as well, those are your strengths and add so much to the lives of those around you as well. Blessings. Thanks for reading. Live inspired! If you would like more information on enneagram type two, check out the complete overview on sale right now! Type 2 Overview! I WANT THIS! You might also like: Enneagram Type 2 and Fictional Characters 5 words each enneagram type needs to hear most
The Enneagram and Motivations Why you do what you do makes you who you are. This is the key to knowing and understanding your type. Two different types may have the exact same behavior, but they are working from completely different motivations. This is fascinating to me, and the real core of the enneagram. So let’s go through the enneagram and motivations today! I’m going to do just a quick summary of each type on the blog, but I am also releasing today some beautiful printables that I think you will love! To get the entire summary, you can now print each type in the fun printables below. They are colorful and formatted simply on one sheet, while including all the points about each type’s motivates and a peek into their character. If you want all nine types in a packet format, they are available in the shop along with a ton more information on each enneagram type… Click Right Here! If you want a specific number, click the buttons for each type to find it in the shop! Or you can always browse the shop to find all of the enneagram products and printables that I have created just for you! Check out the shop! What Motivates Type 1? One’s are innately motivated by righteousness. What I mean by this is, they have in their mind a definite right way that things should be done in any given situation. They strive to do things this way, and avoid doing things, what they consider the wrong way. They judge themselves harshly in how well they are keeping up with this black and white way of life. One’s are keenly judgmental, and hold these standards so high that they are constantly disappointing themselves. This effort to do and essentially be good is the type one’s main driving force. Grab the printable about type one below: Type One Motivation Sheet What Motivates Type 2? The top motivations for two always come back to their relational side. They are in the heart triad, after all, meaning they feel first. However, their feelings are focused outwardly on others instead of what is going on with themselves. Much of their motivation comes from a deep place of wanting to be loved and accepted by others. Of course, we all want love and acceptance, but for the type two, this desire motivates them into action in a very specific way. They seek to provide needs and help others in hopes that this will in turn earn them love and the acceptance they so desire. Below is a complete sample (using type 2) of what the motivation sheets look like and include. Aren’t they fun? The blue boxes on the side, give a quick glance at the key motivations, while the right hand side is written out in descriptive detail about how our motivations make us and what that looks like in each type. I hope you enjoy these printables! Type 2 motivation sheet The Enneagram and Motivations Type 2 What Motivates Type 3? Type three is motivated by success. This will look different for each three depending on what their definition of success happens to be. Many three’s idea of success has been shaped by the influential people they grew up around. This would be parents, teachers, coaches, etc. who gave them an idea of what the “winning ticket” looked like. Threes naturally want to please others, this ties in to their motivation to succeed. If a parent stressed the idea of getting good grades as the picture of success, a type three would do everything in their power to get good grades. They have a strong will about them, that allows them to go after their desires in an almost cut-throat fashion. Find out even more about type three below… Type 3 Motivations Sheet What motivates Type 4? Fours are motivated by authenticity and beauty. This type does not put up with fake of any kind and cannot stand surface levels. Fours are deeply motivated by being their truest, raw versions of themselves, finding beauty in everything, including in pain and darkness, and desiring the same authenticity from others. They know that they are different and they wouldn’t want it any other way. Fours pride themselves in being their own unique expression of who they are, and will even go out of their way to make sure that they aren’t like everyone else. They don’t want to stand out in a “look at me- showy” sort of way, they just want to be themselves and be loved for who they are. More about fours… Type 4 Motivation Sheet What motivates type 5? Fives are motivated by independence and personal capability. If they want to know something, they are extremely fulfilled in figuring it out themselves. This gives them confidence and inner pride. Fives are also motivated to learn and research their interests. They will spend hours lost in discovering what they want to know most. This motivation of independence is carried throughout everything they do. Their inner world is so rich and multi-level that they can sometimes forget to let others in. Think of an iceberg, you see only it’s tip above the water, when in reality it’s bulk is hiding underneath the surface. Fives rarely share all the information, and especially if it is personal. More about fives… Type 5 Motivation Sheet What Motivates Type 6? Sixes are motivated by finding and keeping security. Security is this overarching theme that in seeking for it, causes sixes to also live with anxiety. This anxiety can get twisted into type six’s motivation where the anxiety moves them to do things in the hopes of then having security. Sixes often choose the “safe” thing, or the thing that they have the most support for. Since they often don’t trust themselves, sixes look to others for approval, help with decision making, and ultimately for support or a sense of security. More about sixes… Type 6 Motivation Sheet What Motivates Type 7? Type Seven is motivated by satisfaction. They live this out in many different ways that can look like chasing “fun,” but it more than that. Being future oriented, sevens are always looking for the next thing that will make them happy or fulfill them. They want the experience of feeling satisfied in every aspect, delicious foods, travelling to new places, trying and seeing things they have never seen before. Seven’s love going to events and it truly is all about the experience no matter where they go. If they are at a restaurant, they want the food and the environment to be positive and exciting. More about Sevens… Type 7 Motivation Sheet What Motivates Type 8? Eights are motivated by being in control. They hate others trying to control them or telling them what to do. This isn’t just because they are stubborn or difficult, eights have a true sense of how to manage things well. They have such a strong confidence and a way about them, that they really rarely need someone to tell them what to do. They’ve already thought of it and figured out the most efficient way to move forward. Eights are also highly motivated by justice and protecting those who have no one on their side. They see an underdog like a personal mission, and have no problem saying or doing what is needed to stand up for others. When this type is at their best, they are natural leaders who move mountains, stop bullies, and make real change. More about eights… Type 8 Motivation Sheet What motivates type 9? Nines are motivated by their keen desire to have peace at all times. They see a flawed world full of waves and turmoil, and all they want is calm waters. This desire motivates everything they do… and everything they don’t do. Nines constantly try to “keep the peace.” This can mean mediating between to opposing sides in order to keep a larger argument from breaking out. They also have this keeping the peace methodology internally. Nines want both peace on the outside and a calm inner world into which they can retreat. They are willing to bend and do what is needed to allow for this sort of peace to happen. More about nines… Type 9 Motivation Sheet
What are You Chasing? Do you ever feel like you’re going in circles? Overwhelmed by the cycles of life, and you never quite get to where you set out to go? It may be time to ask yourself, what are you chasing? Why is it that you feel this disconnect from wholeness? Today’s post will cover types 1, 2 and 3 on the enneagram and their specific chase. We are all chasing something in an effort to feel seen, heard, loved and understood. The way we chase after these things however, looks very different for each enneagram number. We are motivated differently, and our subconscious sends us on the chase to fulfill a deep need within us. When this need goes unnoticed, the chase remains as simply a distraction from life’s true meaning and purpose. In attempt to get our needs met, we can create some pretty destructive paths. Identification The first step to understanding your chase is to identify it. What is it you are after? Why are you on this path? Is this the best way to get what you want and be who you want to be? These questions will help you pause and reflect upon what is really going on in your life. Many of us are stuck on “autopilot,” living each day like the one before… but what if there is more. And by more, I mean less… Let’s take a look at each enneagram type, their chase, and movement into growth toward their virtue. By understanding the chase, we can refocus, simplify, and move forward in transforming and beautiful ways. Type one Enneagram type one is chasing improvement and perfection. Doesn’t sound so bad, right? We need people concerned with making things better and striving for the best. However, the chase of the one becomes dangerous when they elevate this desire of improvements over all else. They become obsessed and harsh, pointing out every detail out of place. Judging themselves, others, and their surroundings for short comings, consumes them. And the chase is on! Here’s where the enneagram shines as my favorite tool… We can give the struggling type one practical handles to grab hold of that will literally change their life from chase cycle to a path of contentment and ease. Tools to derail your chase Journaling Ones need a place to channel their negative energy and critiques. Instead of tearing themselves and others down for the things that they see, one way to stop the chase in its tracks is to write these thoughts down. Get them out of your head and down on to paper where they can be put to rest for a while. Beyond letting the critiques be known in a safe place, a type one really needs to acknowledge the good that is happening in their everyday lives. Journaling about what is going right is an extremely powerful move for ones. Name the ten things going well, and let go of the one thing that went wrong. Movement Literally moving their bodies is a great way for ones to get out some of their energy and fill their bodies with positivity. Exercising can also help quiet that inner critic as the brain is flooded with endorphins. Letting Go Making a mental note and personal goal to let go, for type one is a major growth move. There are many little things everyday that are hard to let go of. Letting go of the control in a few small areas will allow for more feelings of peace and harmony, and a new found freedom for ones. Type Two Enneagram type two is chasing affirmation and approval from others. We all want to be liked by others and love hearing that we have done well. For the type two however, they can turn this into a manipulative pull. Subconsciously, twos chase this approval from others and prioritize it above all else. They give, give, give in hopes to gain likability in the eyes of others. Their chase feeds their ego which looks like pride. Two’s become martyr-like, sacrificing in ways beyond healthy boundaries that are both destructive and unwarranted. Tools to Derail Your Chase Pause for thinking It is the two’s instinct to act on whatever feeling is going on at the present moment. They leave thinking behind, and do until they are exhausted. A helpful tool for twos in these moments, is to pause and ask powerful questions to bring up thinking. Can someone else do this task? Do I need to take ownership of this situation? What am I saying no to, if I say yes to this? These simple questions can help the type two really focus on what is important. Prioritizing and setting boundaries helps you live your best life, and move in the ways you were meant to without taking ownership of things that aren’t meant for you to carry. Journal When type twos journal, they tend to focus on other people. Instead, let this journaling time be about you, reflect on how you are feeling. Write down the questions from above for even deeper reflection on what you are taking on. Think about the why in your life. Why am I doing what I am doing? You will be surprised at what comes up and the impact it will have on your life. This journaling exercise helps derail your chase by giving you back the power. It is easy to fall into dependence on others from their opinions to feeling obligated to serve them. You don’t need their approval. You are enough just as you are. Words of affirmation Furthermore, be your own encouragement. Find words that inspire you and choose a place to make them visible daily. Maybe you can write a powerful mantra on your mirror, or put a sticky note near your doorway. Through the ebbs and flows of life, you need to know that you are enough, that you already have everything you need within you. People are going to let you down, and without their love and approval, you still have what it takes inside you to be whole and lovely. Shower yourself with positive self-talk. This means tell yourself the words you need to hear. Steer clear of negativity and work at building yourself up. Say the things you would say to your dearest friend, and you’ll be right on target. Type Three Type three is chasing success and achievement. In one way or another we all want success, but for type three this is their end game. They will avoid failure at all cost, meaning if they have to cut corners a bit to come out on top, they will. In their chase, threes become chameleons in order to get what they want and to look how they feel they need to appear. When type three is caught up in the chase, they have a hard time seeing reality and understanding even who they really are. Their road to wholeness can be a tricky one. Tools to derail your chase Confession To begin the journey to wholeness, threes need to start by finding out where in their lives they are being inauthentic. This can be done through talking with a trusted friend. Being open about real struggles, and confessing where they haven’t been honest. Though challenging at first, this practice of confession will become extremely freeing for the type three. They live their lives in a guarded way, afraid of rejection and failure. By taking this step in honesty and vulnerability, their chase will be thrown off course. Journal Yes, this is a recurring beneficial practice! Each type needs journaling with a slightly different focus. For type three, let your journaling time be the place where you are the most honest. Community When threes move into their healthier space, there is a shift from spotlight on them, to caring more about the group as a whole. This can be done intentionally. Shifting the focus from personal success, to what does the group need? Not only can you lead the group with excellence as a three, but you can take advantage of what the community has to offer. Allow your community to support you, let them lead sometimes, and realize the gifts that come through dependence rather than being the lone wolf. Life will continue to ebb and flow. We will constantly be at odds with the chase. But this doesn’t mean we surrender to it. Even simply being aware that we have a chase, makes us more likely not to fall into it’s patterns. Be kind to yourself as you grow. Just try to make one positive step today that is better than yesterday. Move in the direction you wish to become. I hope that some of these tools will prove helpful for you within your own type and that you will be on your way derailing your chase and living in wholeness. Blessings! Thanks for reading! Grab this printable pdf below, a quick glance at the 9 types passions and virtues. Our passions are the chase left unattended. The virtue is our path toward growth and personal development. I want this printable! Want an overview of all 9 enneagram types? get it HERE! You might also like: Enneagram Type 1 and Fictional Characters Is Your Enneagram Passion Controlling You?
Enneagram Love Letters Happy February Friends! It’s the month we love to love! I also love February because my second son was born ten days before Valentines Day. Celebrating his birthday is always a highlight for our family. This year we are Celebrating with his favorite superhero, Spider-Man! I don’t love the over-commercialized side of Valentines Day, but what I do love is the focal point of expressing our love for each other. This idea I can get on board with! Saying I love you to someone is important, and the way you say it, can mean the world. I thought I would begin this month with a dedication to each type and why I love that type. I hope you enjoy reading this series, “Love Letters to the 9 Types.” My goal is that each type will “feel the love,” and realize that they deserve it! Please share these letters with someone you love. And last of all, read your type and embrace the words meant just for you! Enjoy this week’s love letters to type one and type two: Enneagram Love Letters Want your own copy of this love letter? Grab it with the button below: Love Letter to Type One And now sending love to type two… Enneagram Love Letters Want a copy of the love letter for type two? grab it below: Love Letter to type two Share the love! I hope you enjoyed those love letters and that you will spend some time this month intentionally giving love to those around you in a way they can receive it best. Blessings! Live inspired. You might also like: Loving your community through the enneagram 5 words each enneagram type needs to hear most
Behind the Scenes of Enneagram Type 2 If you would like to listen to the post on the podcast, CLICK HERE! The Podcast! Episode 2! You may know the enneagram type 2 as the helper, but there is much more to them than their strong desire to help others. Today we are going to talk about the many facets of the type 2, going behind the scenes of enneagram type 2 to discover who they really are. I recently heard someone refer to the type 2, as “the befriender.” I like this name more than the traditional “helper,” name given. The befriender seems more fitting for this type. They are constantly making friends everywhere they go, and hold relationships above all else. What don’t we know about type 2? On the surface, type twos appear the most generous. They give without ceasing or wanting anything back. Let’s go behind the scenes of enneagram two. The underlying issue here is that twos actually DO want something back. It is on a subconscious level that they operate this “give and take” contract. They have given to you, loved you, later on, they are going to expect the same generosity and love back. If you asked a two about this, they would likely not agree, unless they are very healthy and working on these areas. Because all of this is done without them thinking about it, they don’t even realize this is their reality. But the fact remains, they do for you, so you will do for them. Why? Twos have an underlying motivation to be loved and accepted for who they are. If they give to you, and love you, they think they can earn your love and acceptance. Being in the heart triad, twos take in information with feelings, but there is a distance between themselves and their own feelings. They tend to be concerned with everyone else’s feelings, and neglect their own. They are also slightly image conscious (especially if they have a 3 wing, which we won’t get into detail here). Behind the scenes of Enneagram Type 2 Why we love befrienders (type twos) I happen to be married to a type 2, which makes me uniquely qualified to share why they are so beloved. Maybe my view is a scant skewed, but I can tell you… No one listens like a 2! When I first met my husband, it was the first time I had felt seen and heard by a boy, ever. Then, of course, I didn’t realize this was part of his “two-ness.” Twos have this amazing quality to give you their full attention. The rest of the world fades away. Their “Spidey-senses” are scanning, listening for your needs, wants, desires, anything they can fulfill. This circles back to their need for approval, appreciation, and ultimately, love. Though it may come off as people-pleasing at times, two’s are excellent care-takers. They will anticipate your needs before you ask them. Nurturing comes naturally to them, and they want nothing more than to fulfill the needs of those around them. They do this without complaint, and will continue cheerfully serving especially when given even an ounce of appreciation. Thinking Repressed Twos happen to be in the thinking repressed stance. This doesn’t mean they don’t use the thinking intelligence center, only that they aren’t using it productively. Most of their thoughts center around other people, and relationships. Things like, “oh, this would be great for so and so,” or “I wonder how so and so is doing… I should go check on them, and bring them a casserole.” These are great thoughts, kind thoughts. However, the two has a hard time focusing on themselves, and what work they need to be doing to improve their own lives. Being thinking repressed also means that twos orientation to time, is the present. They are in the moment people. They aren’t thinking about the past or the future. This is probably what makes them such good listeners. It can also make them poor planners, and a bit on the spontaneous side. What Type 2 Needs from us Type twos almost never speak their needs aloud. This can make it hard to know how to help them, when they are always playing the role of the helper. An easy thing that goes a long way is appreciation. Let the twos in your life know how much you appreciate all the little things they do for you. If you step back and take notice it is probably more than you realize. Send them a note, or text thanking them for whatever way they recently served you. Do something thoughtful for them. This may seem obvious, but returning the favor of service and thoughtfulness is really something twos crave. If they are always watching your kids for you, take their kids for a change. Bring them a favorite coffee, or help them with a current project. Another tip to remember, twos may be the most sensitive type on the enneagram. Because of this, they don’t take criticism well, so tread with caution in this area. It’s nice to use the sandwich strategy: positive compliment to begin (like the bottom piece of bread) criticism in the middle (like the meat of the sandwich) and then another positive compliment to end (like the top piece piece of bread). This strategy works really well in most cases. Thanks for reading! It was fun taking a behind the scenes look at enneagram type 2 with you! I love all the type twos in my life! They really make the world a friendlier place! To read an overview of all the types check out The Enneagram Introduction Want a print out of the image below? Simply click, and you will be directed to the shop where you can find it! Behind the scenes of enneagram type 2
